I won't lie to you, I was sceptical.
Really quite sceptical.
I never actually believed that writing in a journal could/would change my life, which leads me to wonder why I started in the first place. But there you have it. I have been utterly and irrevocably changed by the act of writing down how I feel, what I want, who I'm grateful for, every single day for one whole year.
Well most days anyway, girl's gotta rebel somehow!
Writing seemed to me to be an indulgence that I couldn't afford, run ragged as I was with the little miss. But then that run raggedness perhaps was the very reason I needed to indulge in the first place. I needed a small place where I could be me again, a place where I could rediscover myself or to see if there was anything worth discovering anyway.
And so it is. I am a writer. I write a lot. Not only do I write in my journal (a lot) but I also write this blog, sketch out post ideas, scribble down inspirational quotes and poems that I like and keep two diaries and one calendar (yeah, I know). My journal is the place where everything happens though. It is my whole world, captured on paper. It is the place where I can say how happy I am, what I want, where I want to go and how I'm going to get there, how pissed off I am, what has made me sad.
I write a ton of everyday stuff.
Saturday, 18th October 2014 - "I found it hard with Elizabeth today. Man she is just so determined and I love that except when it comes to not eating. All this week she has just looked at food put in front of here and said no".
Together with how I feel.
Saturday, 25th January 2014 - "I am truly blessed but grumpy this morning".
What I want to achieve.
Tuesday, 31st December 2013 - "I will blog from the heart, I will look after my feet(?!), I will visit a hypnotherapist about my sleep apnea, I will appreciate".
And what inspires me.
Sunday, 6th April 2014 - "You only have access to thoughts whose vibrations are somewhere in your current vibrational range". Abraham Hicks
Put together, this jumble of words and feelings, angry moments, health issues, gratitude and moaning creates a heady mix of magic that has changed my world. How?
1. I'm more focused. I know exactly what I want and I set myself achievable goals to get it. Plus setting my intentions with Susannah's amazing guide to 2014 helped incredibly. Having a word for the year (abundance), gives you a theme, a way to transform your thoughts into action. I am on abundant fire!
2. I'm calmer and happier. I don't think I've ever felt so at peace. Writing has centred me, made me realise a few hard truths about letting go of stuff that no longer serves me and it feels like a weight has lifted, leaving calm, strangely calm Emma behind. I also realised that the introvert in me was crying out for its time in the sun and so I no longer give a shit about going out/being out/having crazy fun (not fun) at the pub/bar/party. It feels like I've hung up my heels and welcomed my slippers and my bunions couldn't be more pleased.
3. I'm engaged with my life. I know what I want and I know that I'm the one that has to go out and get it. I love this empowerment. I love knowing that it's my job to love me, love my life and nobody else's.
4. I'm in the driving seat. Journaling has given me the power to control my destiny. Sound crazy huh but I used to drift along without setting any intentions and you end up not quite doing what it is you want to do, instead you sort of go along with other people's stuff or work stuff or family stuff. Once you start saying to yourself 'this is what I want, this is how I'm gonna get it', well, magic happens my friends. Real life magic.
Do you keep a journal? Does it make things happen?